台北新竹英文家教

學測指考英文寫作 – The Ageing Society

[ 學生原作 ]

The Ageing Society

In the aged society, there are more and more people who need to be taken care of.  As a routine, we offer some elderly allowance in special festivals like double ninth festival and spring festival and have a bus which the elders can take to the hospital for free.  But there are still some old people who need help and are neglected by us.

The first kind of the old people are the elder homeless.  In our society, seldom do we give them our affection.  In my opinion, I would like to build a shelter for them in order not to suffer the freezing cold in winter and the hot day in summer.

The second kind of the old people are the elders living alone.  According to my research, there are many old people who lost their couples.  In their daily life, they sometimes neither cook nor buy food outside.  Because wanting to change the situation, I think that I can offer some lunch and dinner cooperating with the charity institutions for them for fear that they don’t have a regular meal.

The last kind of the old people are those living in the elderly home.  The elders whose children don’t want to take care of may have a feeling that they are thrown away.  In order to make them feel more joyful, I would like to promote the students to be volunteers in their pastime.

The aging population rate becomes higher and higher, so I want to take action like what is mentioned above.

評語：

1  結論太短。

2. 句子還可以稍加潤飾。

[ 修改 ]

The Ageing Society

In the ageing society, there are more and more people who need to be taken care of.  In most cities in Taiwan, local governments will offer the elderly some allowances on special occasions like Double Ninth Festival and Spring Festival, and having free bus pass.  But there are still some old people in need who are neglected by us.

The first kind of the old people is the homeless.  In our society, seldom do we give them our affection.  In my opinion, I would like to urge local governments to build a nursery for them not to let them suffer from hunger, the freezing cold in winter and the burning heat in summer.

The second kind of the old people is the elderly living alone.  According to the research, there are many poor old people who lost their spouses.  In their daily life, they sometimes neither cook nor buy food outside.  If the situation continues, it’ll become several serious problems.  By cooperating with some charities, we can offer lunch and dinner for free to let them have regular meals.

The last kind of the old people is those living in the nurseries.  But their children don’t want to take care of them, which makes them abandoned cruelly.  In order to make them feel the society is warm, I would like to promote the students to be volunteers to pay a visit to them regularly whenever they are available.

Since the average annual growth rate of the aged population increases higher than the birth rate, the necessary policy, measures, and the above actions need to be done as soon as possible to take care of.  If we do, more allowances and welfare are in place and a warm and affectionate society will await the neglected and deserted old people.